Who Wants to be a Voice-Over Artist?

I like to think I take critisism well.

That is, constructive critisism. I don't take rejection badly either; it comes from my being a little conceited...I've learned to discount comments I can live without and continue in a confident manner, the task in hand.

What frustrates me is when I cannot change something, case in question:my natural speaking voice**.

When I was younger, the hardened, "cool" teenagers that I most wanted to impress spoke a certain way, so I followed suit...I went from being "the posh kid with the expensive clothes" to "the kid with the expensive clothes" with just a week's worth of mimicing the accents of nearby Basildon* girls.

Let's face it though, no one fakes anything forever and as I grew up, slowly, back came the plum in my mouth. Not something I have ever since considered a problem. Until Now.

Voice over artists each have their own sounds/mannerisms/accents. I have long been a believer that the Queen's English is not the only voice we should hear on our television sets and radios, favouring a more "relevent" sound for the listener so that they feel they are being spoken to instead of being spoken at.

As with most things, though, political correctness has gone mad. I dread the highlights of the football, because I have no way of knowing what is being said, such is the broadness of the Scottish accent being used by a man whom I can only guess is very knowledgable...I'd truly like to know what he has said!

The only way to get a record deal this year is to have a distinctively "Northern" accent...Leeds, Manchester, Liverpool...if you hail from any of these, and aren't ashamed to sing exactly as you speak, feel free to chuck a demo on the table. (Not a problem with me, I loved the Proclaimers myself...no, really, I did)

So as not to exclude any major denomination of accent; onto the Welsh: the Welsh accent no longer gives people the impression that your life's ambition is to farm sheep for many long hours, deep in the valleys. A colloquial Welsh accent is much sought after in British Television these days. It's quirky. Apparently.

I have nothing against the Welsh. "Himself" (my man) is in fact a fine specimen of a sexy Taff, and Steve Jones, presenter of T4 and Transmission is another very good reason to visit "the West" in vain hope that you might glimpse his manly Welsh self.

Surely with all this diversity, however, there is room in the voice over world for a well spoken Essex girl without a hint of the cockney wannabe about her! I take exception to being told that I might do better to "east end" my accent up a little...the cheek!

Anyway, must dash, toodle pip..over and out daaarlings. Hmmmn.

*for those that dont' know, Basildon being the sort of place that you get beaten up for being "posh"/educated/well spoken***.

**Oddly, however, if I try to sing "Diamonds are a girls best friend", I turn into a very nasal cabaret singer from Hackney ... all that is required is a clapped out old piano and Ethel from Eastenders and we could 'ave a right ole knees up.

*** or pretty/ clever/ not in a velour tracksuit.